Monday, April 18, 2011

Cupcake disaster.

"Cupcake" and "disaster" are two words that should never be in  the same sentence, but I have paired them way too many times since I started baking.

Exhibit "A."

- A pitcher of what should have been cupcakes.  Instead they were something that looked like biscuits, and felt like briquets.  They are Lemon Ricotta Muffins, and they were going to get a healthy smear of cream cheese frosting.  The last time I made these, I swooned as they were the most delicious and texturally beautiful treat I have ever eaten (I say that a lot).  When one takes a cupcake or muffin out of its pan, she should be afraid of squishing it's little body, as they should be delicate and tender.  I took these out of the tin, and they were (even fresh from the oven) hard and- well, hard!  Why?  I learned that day that I should never bake these in double batches.  It is a very thick (understatement) batter, almost like biscuit dough; so it is very easy to over mix.  And I did.  Lots and lots.

Langston ate them.

Well, not all of them.

And onto Exhibit "B."

These are Sour Cream Chocolate Cupcakes with Chocolate Buttercream.

Disaster, right?  I even put sprinkles on them!

OK.  These weren't a disaster in the way they taste.  I think.  I didn't eat one, but I did try the batter, and that stuff was pretty amazing!  The disaster was in the delivery.

I have a friend named "E."  If I could say one thing about her, I would say that she is "friendly."  Casual in style and demeanor, open in heart, always willing to help a friend, never vain and always beautiful- insightful, scholarly, and not above eating a cupcake- E's birthday was last Thursday; and she got nothing from me aside from a "wall post."

Bad.  Friend.

So, as we both sing together, it was my goal to bring a dozen cupcakes to vocal rehearsal last night to celebrate her passed birthday.  I figured I could get rid of maybe 4 of them, and rest I would pawn off on some unsuspecting soul (who is probably on a diet).  And then the madness began.

1.  E arrived late, so I wasn't able to explain to her that I had made her cupcakes.
2.  Vocal rehearsals ended, and immediately 10 kids came in to rehearse a song.
3.  Add 6 people more when the band arrived simultaneously.
4.  Minus half of the vocalists who left without cupcakes (who probably would have refused them anyway).
5.  By this point, I am thinking, "What was I thinking?"
6.  Add child whom I love asking me "Who are the cupcakes for?"  DRAT!  The children have spotted the cupcakes!
7.  Add my own child being, well, my own child.
8.  Add another child asking about the cupcakes.
9.  Add a musician asking about cupcakes.

Eleven cupcakes, in need of a loaves-and-fishes miracle, and no one with the faith to do it.  I am panicking!

"Well, what happened?"

Langston needed to leave, so I looked at one of the kids (all but one family of kids have left by now) and said, "Make sure E gets one, and then ask your mom if and when you can have one."  And I left.  Eleven cupcakes and 15 people.

What a mess.

How embarrassing.

Happy Birthday, friend, and I will do something successfully nice for you soon.

Chocolate Sour Cream Cupcakes (adapted from Sweetapolita)
*makes 24 cupcakes:)

6 Ounces unsalted butter, softened
2 cups dark brown sugar (I used light brown and it was fine)
2 t vanilla extract
3 large eggs, at room temp
8 ounces (1 3/4 c) all purpose flour
3/4 cup cocoa powder
1 1/4 t baking soda
1 t baking powder
1 t salt
1 1/2 c sour cream
1/4 c mayonnaise

One recipe Chocolate Fudge Frosting

Cream together butter, sugar, and vanilla (about 5 minutes) until light and fluffy.  Add in eggs, one at a time, until incorporated.

Whisk together all of the dry ingredients in a medium sized bowl.  Add to your butter mixture, alternating with the sour cream, beginning and ending with the flour.  You might (I know I did) need to help your batter by hand, as it will be really, really thick.

After everything is incorporated, fold in the mayo (yes, mayo).  You will not regret this addition.  It adds so much moisture!

Bake in the oven for 16-18 minutes at 350.

After cooling, frost those cupcakes, and please- if you are going to "be confectionate" with them, make enough for the whole crowd.

Rachel Bee, happy with tomorrow's delicious post in her belly.


  1. :) thanks for letting my kiddos indulge. they loved the cupcakes...and they love you!

  2. RACHEL! I just saw this post! Hilarious... I don't even remember everything that happened that night but I do know that I still have your cupcake thing. I'll ask Brooke to bring it to church next Sunday. Thanks for your kindness... :) And the cupcake. I got plenty! :)

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